Tomorrow, your only a day away!

I sit here tonight with a room full of all the people I love most in my life.  Everyone is fast asleep in dreamland and I am loving all the snores and grunts coming from each of them.  I tell you, I am nothing but a hot mess today....and in hot I do not mean "Hot."  I mean a crying, emotional mess.  Honestly, I have never considered myself to be a very emotional person.  I cry at weddings.  I have cried each time I have first seen the faces of my three children.  I sometimes shed a tear or two at a very sad movie.  But if I ever really start...it is hard for me to stop.  Today has been one of those times in my life. 

In my mind over and over I keep thinking, what if this were my last day to live?  What if this was my last night to show love to my family and snuggle my sweet girls?  What if this was my last chance to tell them about Jesus or to have shared with those around me what Christ means to me? 

Don't get me wrong, I am not planning on anything drastic happening tomorrow, but my heart is so full of emotions tonight.

We had our pre-opt appointment today and we got a tour of the L&D floor,  where I will be resting for the next several days.  I saw one poor woman walking the halls stopping and bearing her head into her husband, obviously very much in labor.  Normally, I would have felt sorry for as she breathed through her contractions, but not today.  In fact, I really wish we were arriving tomorrow to have a baby....I do know I can do that and it is so much better than this. 

They gave me these strange wipe like things that I have to use tonight to wipe down my stomach.  There are all these detailed directions to them, like you have to wait one hour after your shower to use them.  You cannot use and lotions, deod., make-up, or etc.  You have to attach the label to a form and return it to the hospital saying that you followed the directions.  I have to admit it is making me a little freaked out.  I guess the purpose is to reduce the amount of germs on your body, and since I am a little germ conscience anyways (esp. with hotels and hospitals) I am a little freaked out by this.  I mean....how much scrubbing should one do? :)

We have been so showered with love from our church family and friends.  We have enough food here to last us a month.  Seriously, we didn't even have to go to a store today to get a thing!!  It has been such a blessing.  We sincerely thank you!

So, tomorrow morning bright and early little Eli's nice, dark and cozy little world will be interrupted by doctor's, nurses, bright lights and even his very first shot.  Our fetal coordinator who is also a nurse practitioner will be in the surgery as well.  She will be calling Kevin throughout the surgery to give him updates.  She will also be taking a picture of little Eli's back for us prior to the repair.  That will be about all of him that we should be able to see, but I cannot believe we will even get to see that much. 

Please pray for us tom.  Please feel free to ask anyone who you know loves the Lord to also pray for us.  We covet your prayers and feel confident that the ultimate healer will be there in the midst with us tomorrow.