Saturday, January 29, 2011

Sometimes GOD Says No!

The fact that I woke up at 5:00am on my own this morning and have tossed and turned, as this post mulled over and over in my head...I knew there was only one thing to do!  Get up and write it down!

Sometimes God says no!  No one ever likes to hear NO!  Whether you are tiny or a grown adult being told no, it is never fun!  It makes things a bit more complicated when it is God who says No.  Despite your prayers, despite your agonizing, despite your tears, despite your promises, despite your hopes and dreams, despite the prayers of the righteous, despite fasting, despite medical intervention and the best that man can do....sometimes God says no! Please don't stop reading at this point!!

I have been mulling and living this thought for the past five years. 

When God says no it is for many reasons.  It is because He is GOOD!  It is because He has Plans and Purposes that man does not know.  It is because Heaven is at stake. When God says no, it changes the course of lives.  He says no because He sees vulnerable humans who want to know and experience Him and He longs to reveal Himself to them.  He says no because He is writing a story that only He can finish!  He says no because He sees that His saying no can help others see him more clearly.  He says no because He sees the big picture and He knows that it is good. 

He says No because He knows that in the No... He is sufficient.  He feels their hurts and is a man himself well acquainted with sorrow.  He knows that He will be there giving sufficient grace for each day. He knows that He will be there in that small little hospital room.  He will be there as he takes his last little breath.   He will be there as the tiny blue casket is lowered in the ground.  He will be there as they drive away...leaving.  He will be there as they mourn. 

And in the No, when there are no prayers left to be prayed.  Nothing left to try.  When the last tear falls...there is God.  His presence is and was enough to make you think you were standing on Holy Ground.  He presence was so real that you could never again doubt Him!  His sweet presence was so real and precious, that in a strange way you long to go back to that day just to experience that closeness and dependence again.

I do imagine that if God never said might just miss out on some of what life is really all about. 
Happy 5th Birthday in Heaven to the most precious no God has ever bestowed on me. 

Monday, January 17, 2011

Hidden Value

We have been busy busy at our home making some major changes in our living spaces.  We knew our major purchase of 2011 would be big girl furniture for the girls.  I have always planned for them to share a room and Ella who is 3 1/2 was begging for a big girl bed.  Needless to say it was time.  I am so not for rushing to put kids in a big bed until they are ready.  Ella is totally the child that this decision could have been major work and drama.  She did escape from her crib one night around the age of two, but thankfully some firm discipline kept this from happening again.  She has been a good sleeper, so I felt no need to rock the boat. 

I knew in my mind what kind of beds of wanted and I have looked and looked on craigslist, on-line and dreamed through my pottery barn magazines.  A few days after Christmas we were walking around Costco and we found just what I had in mind.  Two beautiful white twin beds and two adorable dressers.  Now we were planning on this being a later in the year purchase, and so we weren't really ready to buy them right after Christmas.  Plus we knew that this transition was going to require a ton of work and re-arranging of  several rooms. 

I put my request in to my personal finance guy...(Kev) and maybe mentioned a few times how much I really liked them.  I think Kev has learned in our almost 8 years of marriage that I know what I like and I am willing to wait and work to get it.  So we started thinking.  Three years ago Kevin received a super nice Cartier watch from work as a reward for his years of top sales to his company.  We knew it was a nice watch a worth a lot, but seriously it had sat in our playroom closet for 3 years.  My husband is not a Cartier watch kinda wearing guy.  He has a hardd enough time keeping up with his fossil watch.  I started researching and knew this might be our answer to the furniture.  We took it to a local shop that buys Cartier and before Kevin went in we discussed the amount that we would be willing to sell it for.  I stayed in the car with the girls and Kevin walked out with the exact amount we said we would take.  Needless to say we headed to Costco and bought it that day.  To think we'd had that value sitting in our closet and never really knew it!!!

So we have been working like dogs moving the office downstairs, turning Eliza's room into a super fun playroom with a toy closet that might just be my answer to toy mania, painting and then and moving both girls into our old playroom.  It has been a ton of work, but I am loving the end result.  It almost feels like we have a new house.  Two nights down and sharing a room has gone great!!  I will post pics soon!

Saturday, January 1, 2011

A Look Back and A Look Ahead

It's hard to believe that today starts a new year.  I always find myself filled with mixed feelings as one year closes and a new one unfolds.  Sad, on one hand that time continues to march forward despite me wanting to slow it down, and yet excited and a bit apprehensive that there is newness on the horizon. 

2010 was a great and busy year for our family.  With Kev in school full-time and having two under two for most of the year it was quite busy.  Some days just getting out the door by 1:00 was a big accomplishment...and I am not kidding! 

I am sure that 2011 will bring is share of fun, busyness, and challenges.  All I know is that I am thankful that I have the Lord's Grace and Mercy that follows after me as I run this race of life.