28 weeks

I am finally into my 28th week of this pregnancy that feels to be never ending.  I know it is because from like week 21 on I knew that it would most likely be shorter and could be very short.  I am pretty sure that has completely thrown off my since of....normal.  Usually at this point I am not quite to the re I am so ready to get this baby out point!!  I know Eli needs lots of more baking time and so that is what we will do for as long as we can. 

In all honesty, I have been feeling pretty discouraged the past few days.  After we lost our first child Samuel, it was such a constant struggle to not look around at what blessings others had been given but to try to keep my eyes focused on God's plan for us.  Whenever I would look "externally" at happy healthy families I would feel so frustrated and forsaken.  I am struggling again with that now.  Ask any pregnant woman what she wants...boy/girl and you most likely will get one answer.  In fact...it has always been my answer until a few weeks ago.  "I don't care if it is a boy or a girl as long as it is healthy."  But what happens when your baby is NOT healthy.  UGGG!!!!  Struggling with lots of unanswerable questions and praying that my eyes will be focused not on me, but on God's plan for our family.

8 Years

Eight years ago today I made a really good choice.  In fact, the best choice I've ever made outside of my personal decision to be a follower of Christ.  I often look at this picture that sits in our family room and think of ourselves on that day.  We were young.  We were in love.  We had big plans for our future. But, honestly we had no clue how hard the next eight years were going to be. I know if you would have asked us, we'd honestly admitted to knowing the whole "for better or for worse" meant there would be some "for worse," but I am pretty sure we thought we had a good 40 or so years of happily ever after before we got there. 

I can honestly say that there really is something to doing it God's way.  No, it doesn't mean that life is going to work out the way you wish.  But it does mean grace upon grace and that adds up to a lot.

I can also honestly say that we have grown the most in our marriage in the really hard times.  We've faced issues that the world would say would tear a young marriage apart and come through them stronger and more in love with each other.  I know this is not on account of us, but rather God working in our lives. 

The past eight years have brought so many blessings too.  I can hardly remember what my life was like before we were married.  I am so thankful that I can honestly say that I love you so much more today than I did eight years ago. It truly does get sweeter with time!  Happy Anniversary!

Friday's Appt.

The blog has been pretty quiet again.  I have a great reason.  I had two sick sweeties all week long.  They had some yucky viral thing that caused fever, rashes, vomiting...the works.  It made for a long week.  My sister Jess surprised us with a visit home, and I do not know what I would have done without her help each day.  She has been such a help with the girls, cleaning, cooking, etc.  And what do we in appreciation for all she did...we shared our germs with her sweet little guy.  We all pretty much knew it was inevitable. The good news is that they all had it right about the same time and so they are ALL finally better.  I always think once we get over a sick bug that I am sure glad that I didn't know it was coming or how long it would last.  I have found that to be true in life as well!

I had my weekly appointment today.  I am almost 28 weeks!!  I am so thankful to be closing out the 20's and heading into the final trimester of pregnancy...which most likely will be a short one!!  The not so good news first is that Eli's ventricles continue to increase a little each week.  They really need to stop!!  They are not bad yet but we are at the point that we don't want to them to get larger.  I really really wish that we could avoid a brain shunt.  This would be major!!  Now for the good news.  We finally saw some leg movement today.  The ultrasound guy worked really hard to get them to move and finally we saw him ever so slightly move both of his legs a bit.  He even bent one knee a little.  I know this sounds like so little, but after not seeing any for 5 weeks we were very worried.  Please continue to pray that the Lord would heal the little nerves that are not working normally in his legs.  Please pray that he can have as much leg function as possible as he grows.  It made our day and I was a very proud momma! 

I would like to ask you to pray for a girl who had the same surgery as we did, but a week later.  Her amniotic fluid was very low this week and she is on hospital bed rest for the remainder of the pregnancy.  I learned of her story through her blog and I am praying for her and her little Andrew.  I cannot imagine how hard this would be and I know that I could easily find myself there if a complication arose. 

Woo hoo for a long weekend and daddy being off of work for a few days!!  Yeah!!!!!

Easter Pic. Update

These pictures were taken the week before Easter.  I knew I'd still be in the hospital on Easter Sunday, but I still wanted to take our yearly Easter Sunday pictures. So, this was our early Easter of 2011!

Nobody fuss at me for lifting Eliza!  This was taken at 22 weeks just prior to surgery!
And just to note...I've grown a ton since then!!

Daddy and his best girlies!

4th post op appointment

We had our weekly ultrasound and appointment today.  It went pretty good.  There were no major changes and so far so good.  Eli's right ventricle is still normal and is left is slightly enlarged.  There was a tiny bit of an increase since last Fri. on that side.  Please pray that it will stabilize.  It def. does appear that his right foot is clubbed.  That makes us sad, but in the scheme of things it isn't as major.  My fluid levels continue to be great and I am feeling really good.  I wish that since I am feeling so good that I could resume my normal activities, but since pre-term labor is such a known risk following the surgery...I will continue to take it easy.  We got several great 3d pictures of Eli today and we got to watch him put his toes in his mouth!   It was crazy! He weighs 2lbs 1oz. as of today.    If you pray for him please pray for his leg movement and function, his ventricles to stabilize and not continue to increase and that he will stay snug inside for at least 7 more weeks.  Thank you for praying for us!

A few surgery Pics

 We were lucky enough that our sweet fetal surgery coordinator who is a part of the fetal surgery team was able to take some pictures of my surgery. Don't worry...I left out all of the close-ups!!  We have pictures of my uterus completely out of my body with Eli inside.  I had no clue how big my uterus already was at 22 weeks at the time of my surgery!  No wonder my clothes were not fitting. We also got some pictures of his spina bifida lesion prior to repair on his very very tiny little back.  I am so thankful for each of the individuals in this picture.  They are everyone from my surgeons, Eli's neurosurgeon, and anaesthesiologist, and a ultrasonographer.  I am so thankful for the team that the Lord used and equipped for us that day!  I am thankful for their value of this little life inside me.  But, I do believe with all my heart that if our eyes could really see...

 We would see that...

 We were not alone!

(I recently saw this picture and immediately loved it!)

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Hebrews 12:1
As you do not know the path of the wind, or how the body is formed in a mother's womb, so you cannot understand the work of God, the Maker of all things. Ecc. 11:5

Someone's not such a fan of the pool!