Happy 2nd Birthday to my sweet Eliza Anne

It is hard to believe that our sweet little Eliza Anne is already TWO!  Two years ago tonight Kev, Ella and I ate Mexican and came home to an anxious night before my 8am induction.  Eliza started out a peanut at 5lbs 15oz. and today she weighed a whopping 23 pounds.  I have come to accept that Eliza is just going to be tiny, despite the fact that she is generally a great eater. 

Eliza is the sweetest little thing.  I guess I have already used that word to describe her 3 times, but she is just so sweet.  In fact, had she been our firstborn we'd probably thought we were gifted with excellence in parenting.  She is generally very compliant and obedient.  She is a great sleeper and loves to be in her bed.  She loves to be held and is so snuggly.  She is quiet and super observant.  When she is nervous she plays with her hands and she finds security in sniffing her little pink blankie square.

I love everything about her!  From her thin blond hair to her striking blue eyes.  She tans way better than her mommy ever will despite the fact that she wears 55spf.  Eliza has the cutest giggle and when she gets started she can't stop!  We can't help but laugh when she does.

Eliza loves shoes.  In fact, as soon as her clothes go on she heads to her closet to pick out her shoes.  She has some serious fashion opinions on which shoes she wants to wear each day.  She loves playing with her babies and is constantly filling a purse.  Her favorite thing to do is pushing her babies in her stroller.  Her favorite person is definitely Ella and she has always been a mommy's girl.  She has adjusted pretty good to being a new big sister, and she thinks her daddy gives the best piggyback rides.

Eliza has always been our climber.  She is a quick one!  Thankfully, I think we are ending that stage.  She is a little mischievous, yet is more sneaky about it than her big sis.  She was recently found in the bathroom eating a tube of chapstick.  She had closed the door and was hiding beside the toilet.  She also woke me up the other morning telling me she needed to "pross" (Floss).  I got up to find about 10 feet of dental floss unraveled in the bathroom. 

Eliza is relatively easy to discipline.  She likes to please and has tender feelings. She has reminded us that each child is so different and has to be parented in a different way.  Oh, and she gives looks that can kill...see below!

Eliza, we love you so much!  You bring a sense of calmness and sweetness into our home.  You are such a blessing and we cannot wait to watch you grow throughout this next year.  Happy 2nd Birthday lizze lou!!

2 Months (a week late)

Last week Mr. Eli turned two months old.  My due date with him was Aug. 23rd so technically he should really be about a month or so, but since he was 6 weeks early we have already gotten a full two months to love on him. 

Eli is a wonderful baby.  Last week he started sleeping though the night.  Praise the LORD!!  He is generally sleeping from 9-10 pm until 4:30 or 5ish.  Now if I can just get myself in bed at a decent time, I might finally catch up on some sleep.  I have always stayed up too late, but I am finding that nighttime is the only time I can catch up on things I need to do and the only time I can relax.  Okay...back to Eli.

Eli is growing like a little weed.  My goodness he has some serious cheeks!  It is so strange to me that I am feeding on the same schedule I did with the girls and the same substance (breast milk) and he is growing so much faster!  His weight is in the 75%.  My girls always lingered in the 25% and below (Eliza much below).  I am not sure why he is growing faster...maybe it is a boy thing!  One thing is for sure...he loves him some milk!
At his appointment last week he weighed 9lbs 12 oz. 

Last week we were super busy with appointments.  We went back to see Neuro. and so far Eli's head appears to be growing normally.  It is in the 75%, but so is his weight and so far it is not jumping in percentiles.  His fontanel is still soft and so far he doesn't appear to need a brain shunt.  This of course was one of the main reasons we opted to go through with the fetal surgery, due to the fact that the research showed the surgery decreased the need for one.  We are praying his little head will continue to grow as it should.  He will most likely have an MRI in November, but right now they will continue to just monitor head circumferences. 

We saw ortho last week as well.  This appointment always makes me nervous (well, they really all do).  A month ago when we saw the orthopedist he was very honest and was the first to really inform us that Eli was not functioning as well as he should for the level that his lesion was on his spine.  It was really hard news for me to hear seeing that went through so much in our pregnancy with the hope that he would do even better than expected.   Over the month, I found myself accepting this news, yet as the month went along Kev and I both felt as though Eli had more feeling in his legs than the doctor thought.  Basically, the doctor felt as though he had no feeling below his knees.  We really felt that he had feeling down into his calves at least.   Well, at our appointment this past week the doctor confirmed that he clearly has some feeling in his lower legs.  We were so thankful that it wasn't just us being hopeful. but that the doctor also noticed it too. 

Our ortho is an older man and has been working with kids with spina bifida for a long time.  He said a few times that he didn't understand it, but that Eli clearly had more feeling than he had a month ago.  I made sure to let him know that Eli has had a lot of people praying for his little legs.

Eli also got his first set of casts for his clubbed feet.  All of our doctors have told us that they feel that his feet were clubbed due to his position in the womb (it can also with spina bifida too).  We have been doing lots of stretches, but the doctor decided to go ahead with cast.  I was prepared and ready for this....and I was actually excited to get the process started!  In the past if you would have told me that my 2 month old would be wearing heavy, bulky cast, I would have been devastated, but with the Lord's help I was ready.  The cast immediately made his legs look longer, bigger and in the correct position.  It made my heart happy!

Eli has been a trooper all week.  His has shown us how strong his little legs are when he lifts, lowers and moves his little casted legs.  I know they are heavy for him and yet his is quite determined to move them.  We are so proud of him.   He will get his cast off tomorrow and I am anxious to see what kind of improvements were made in a week.  We won't see the ortho for 3 more weeks and he will most likely go through a series of casting then.  He will also have x-rays on his hips then too.

We also have been seeing an early interventionist once a month and a physical therapist every week.  I am so thankful because we love them both.  The E.I. comes to our home and pretty much plays with Eli.  She is so sweet and loving with him.  She gives us homework and ideas of things we can do to encourage growth and development.  It is so different because with our girls we just let them develop naturally.  I am trying to not become paranoid with all the milestones and etc. and just enjoy him as he is.  So far, he seems to be doing great!

Our physical therapist is awesome.  I have been told by several people that she is the BEST and many have asked how we got picked up by her.  (If you read this...thank you Amy!)  I am so thankful that we did and I can already tell that she will be a special person in Eli's life.  She praised him over and over and told him how great he was! 

And one final thing...little Eli has started giving us the absolute cutest smiles ever.  They seriously melt my heart and almost make me cry! So thankful for my little guy!

Sisters and brother

Two big sisters who are loved so very much.  Bringing us daily laughter and joy....they fill our home with bows and bloomers, purses and babies.   They love each other fiercely and fight as sisters do.  They cry and comfort when the other is punished, and melt mommy's heart as they hold hands sweetly in the back seat of the van.  They have their own "play" that often leaves us wondering.  They love to match, most days.... and Ella often confesses that Eliza is her favorite friend.  Eliza is content letting Ella take the lead and often does whatever Ella tells her to do (not always the best idea).  These two sweet girls redeemed our loss and have filled our hearts with thankfulness.   They remind me of health, happiness and normalcy.

Little brother...so new and so young.  Each day we are learning you more and loving you more.  You are teaching us to look at life from an eternal perspective.  You are teaching us that it is okay to be different...okay to have challenges.   You have rocked our little world and all I know is that God must have some awesome plan for you.  Every little milestone...even as small as tracking a toy or responding to a sound is a new celebration.  We will walk through the challenges ahead beside you, cheering you on and upholding you with our love.  Little brother....so loved, so cherished, so very sweet.

We Ask...

Ella kissing Eli's little foot

Everynight at bedtime Ella prays for Eli.  She won't go to bed without praying for him (which quite possibly could be a stall tactic..but it always works none the less).  We have been slow to share much with her about spina bifida and Eli's disability.  Pretty much all we have said is that we needed to pray for Eli's little legs that they will grow strong.  She is a smartie and always picks up on more than I think she is.  Everynight she says, "Thank you Lord for this day.  We ask for Eli's little legs to grow strong so he can use a walker one day."  She has also started adding in a new line that goes something like this, "Lord you are all our hope."  Then she bee-bops down the hall and jumps into bed.  I cannot tell you how much her little prayers, bursting with childlike faith, bless and encourage her mommy's heart.

A sneek peek!

A friend of ours took some pictures of Eli and our family a few weeks ago.  I thought I'd share just a few. 

Happy 33rd Kev!!

Eliza and her daddy!

Hospital days

More hospital days!

Daddy and his BOY!

I never want to see you dressed like this again, but I am so thankful you were with me.

Holding Eli for the first time!

Ella and Daddy in the NICU

Oh those hospital days!

The boys napping!!

Today is Kev's 33rd birthday.  I have been stressed all day because I'd like to have the house clean, dinner cooked, a cake made, and a gift bought and wrapped in a few short hours.  As the morning has progressed I have felt the stress rising, knowing that there is no way I can get it all done and be Betty Crocker home maker, shopper, kid feeder, house cleaner, and birthday party extraordinaire planner all in the hours of this day.  If there is anything that 2011 has taught us and is teaching us is that we cannot do it all or be it all! 

In our eight short years of marriage this one has taken the cake!  If there was ever a year that either one of us would like to get in the car and drive as far away as possible or throw in the towel...it would be this one.  We often laugh that we really didn't know what for better or for worse really meant!  It means a lot and the stress of this year has been really hard on us individually as well as our marriage.  It hasn't been all pretty, but we are continuing to learn what it means to be married, to show grace, and to individually seek the Lord.

I am so thankful that I am married to such a faithful and loving husband.  He has loved me on the days when I was so blown up with fluids from that awful c-section...I seriously felt pretty unlovable.  He has loved me on days when I have lost my temper in frustration and anger.  He has loved me on days when the tears wouldn't stop flowing I couldn't explain why. He has helped me in the middle of night when I  felt so sleep deprived that I couldn't wake up one more time.  He has bought groceries, cooked meals, taken over bathtime,  and helped me try to keep our house in order.  I would have lost my mind these past 7 weeks without him.

I am so thankful for Kev's faith.  His faith that God has a plan for us and for Eli has helped me not to lose mine.  Honestly, I have never seen him express anger over the fact that Eli might never play typical sports or that his son has a disability.  He has reminded me many times that there is so much more in life than sports!  I am so thankful that Eli will have such a strong and God-loving dad to look up to.  I am encouraged that Eli will grow up to be a very normal, yet extraordinary guy because of his dad's influence in his life.

His two little ladies think he is pretty great too! 

So, the house may still be messy (I have been cleaning up messes all day), and dinner may not be hot or even finished, and a cake...we'll we are really trying to lose some pounds, and a gift...it may be delayed until you can watch the kids and I can shop. BUT, I hope you know how much this family needs you and how much you are loved.  

Busy Week

This has been a super busy week of appointments for us.  Eli had his first spina bifida clinic day on Tuesday.  Today we met with the Early Interventionist, went to the brace company to get his hip brace fixed and then Eli and Eliza had a check-up with our regular pediatrician.  Tomorrow is my 6 week check-up and Monday is the dentist.  I must say that it is busy trying to make sure we have everything that each of our littles might need during such busy running around days.  I am sure you moms can understand. 

I am happy to report that so far little Eli is doing well.  He now weighs 8lbs 6oz.  That is a big gain for our little preemie.  I finally have a baby who loves to eat and has big chubby cheeks!!  Thankfully, his head circumference growth is normal. They will recheck it again in two weeks when we see the neurosurgeon.  I am thankful for each day the we go without the need of a shunt.  We will have some bigger tests coming up in November to get a better look at his kidneys, bladder and etc.  I am praying already that it will go well. 

I am exhausted and need to cherish my minutes while the house is calm and quiet.